AKA a whiskery mystery.
It was a normal day at first.
I woke up, went through my regular waking routine, having coffee, getting ready for work, and then, just as I was about to groom my moustache with my little Slim Jim comb and hair gel...
I realized it wasn't there!
My moustache was gone!
My lip was naked!
I never could get the hang of Thursdays.
But what could have happened?
Did I shave it off and forget about it?
Nah –that's weird and unlikely.
Did Krista shave me while I slept?
Nah, she wouldn't do that –that's even weirder and less likely.
Did I develop some strange follicular/dermal condition?
Well, there was no evidence of moustache hairs on my pillow (or anywhere else in the house), and my lip felt fine, despite its nudity, so that's not it, either.
Then what was it?
What...in the name...of all that's decent...?
Until just recently, that is.
Patchy tufts of lameness.
I became sad.
I lost sleep.
And, Samson-like, even my painting skills suffered a bit.
But, short of wearing a fake moustache, I realized I'd just have to get used to being whisker-free indefinitely...maybe even for the rest of my life!
So I just kept my lip shaved clean.
And then I got an email from a strange address. Figuring it was just more spam, I dragged it to my "junk" folder, but something caught my eye as I did so. I had a second, closer look at the email's attachment and realized something even stranger was happening in my life.
I still can't explain (because I don't understand) what's going on, but see for yourself:
Then, a short while later, another email came through:
Then more...and more...